I can honestly say I have never been a morning person. Although I do see the appeal of getting up to hear the birds, smell the fresh morning air, seeing the odd sunrise, and just enjoying the calm before the hustle and bustle of the day kicks in. I, however, have always preferred to enjoy these moments from the comfort of my own bed.
Perhaps, if I liked coffee, a morning cup-a-Joe would perk me up enough to make me love morning. Probably not. Ironically, my hubby bought me a PJ set that says “Little Miss Sunshine” as I clearly am not in the morning. In fact, speak to me at your own risk.
But now (post RA), how do I feel about morning?
A typical morning goes something like this…
I wake early, from what is usually a restless sleep (I used to be such a good sleeper). Somehow, that once comfortable position now gives me great pain or I have bent a joint into an unnatural position and this has awoken me. Despite many attempts I cannot go back to sleep. What is the alternative? Get up? I ponder this simple, yet complicated idea for a while. This is when I remind myself that after I sit up (which is an exercise in itself) I will need to take that first step out of bed, and it is going to hurt. Somehow, I find the strength and willpower to place my feet on the ground, and by a miracle, I assume the standing position. I appear as an old lady hutched over and uneasy on my feet, while I grab the nearby dresser to steady my first movements. I prepare to shuffle my way out of the bedroom. Thank goodness for my super puffy slippers that give my bones in my feet some cushion and allow me to slide my feet across the floor giving my knees the option of not engaging for a little while longer. I will continue to shuffle my feet along the floor to the bathroom, I am thankful we have wood floors because I'm sure if we had carpet I might shock myself each morning with all the static electricity I would create. I arrive at the bathroom, exhausted. I take a look at myself in the mirror, wondering how I will get through yet another day, ironically I am already to go back to bed. I take a deep breath and the day begins. It will be several hours until I can start to give the appearance of moving 'normal' even if it still hurts. Morning stiffness is just part of my daily routine.
I have never been a morning person. But RA doesn't allow me those extra hours to sleep in anymore. RA makes me get up much earlier than my fatigued body would like. RA makes mornings difficult and I must fight to start each and every day. Because life does go on. And RA although you keep trying to keep me down, I will continue to rise, albeit slowly, each and every morning, despite all the stiff, sore, and swollen joints. I am not a morning person but I don't want YOU, RA, to take away my sunrises, fresh morning air and birds. There is a world out there to discover and I don't remember you, RA, being invited.
Good morning world!